Something strange is going on at our house, and I need you all to help me sort this out. As you may or may not know, I have a tendency to find myself having in depth conversations with Ryan and the wooden spoon every three days or so. These little discussions have always gone like this in the past:
1) I break some sort of a rule....have an attitude (hush!).....perhaps forget who is in charge
2) Ryan decides he has had enough, and he tells me I am going to be spanked.
3) I am hauled over his knee, and he and the spoon began their little tirade on my bottom.
4) I cry.....I may even beg him to stop....and I always promise to do better.
5) He hugs me....I accept said hug....and we move on and I am essentially reset.
Lately the above, has been going down some thing like this:
1) See above :)
2) Ryan again decides he has had enough and tells me I am getting a spanking.
3) I get MAD.....and try to wiggle my way out of being in trouble....he begins to spank me.
4) The spanking makes me even more mad....and I am finding (this is weird)....that it does not hurt the way that it used to.
5) He continues to spank, but really it is not helping because it is really only stinging....and did I mention it is making me MAD!!
So.....what in the world is going on here? Am I used to the wooden spoon, the whole routine? Do we need to use something different....although the thought of that just scares me and my bottom to death.
And before you think.... every three days...... POOR RYAN......just realize some of these spankings are more of the stress reliever variety. I mean we all know I never claimed to be an angel.....I would like to get to heaven....I am not going for sainthood here ;)
I really just want for our old method to work. I have found (and I cannot believe I am admitting this) that spanking really does relieve my stress. Being at home all day with three little ones day in and day out can make one......cranky......on occasion. I may get a little snippy, and Ryan realizes I have probably had a rough day....and we have found that spanking resets me. Not that I go into it willingly....again not trying to make it into the Bible or anything.....I always try to convince him I don't really need a spanking.
Help me blogger friends/spanking experts....whoever out there is reading this! What is wrong? Is it my mindset? Am I immune to the spoon? <~~~~~~~That is kind of catchy.....if that is it, I am having a T-shirt made. I think Ryan would LOVE it, don't you? ;)
I just read this to my MM. He says that Ryan needs a bigger spoon.
ReplyDeleteSigh!
It is possible that you are too used to it. You might not need harder, just different. Sometimes it helps me a bit if I don't know exactly what is going to happen.
Great t-shirt!
Ack! Is MM aware that Ryan reads this blog??? Bigger spoon....that seems a little scary!
DeleteI think I am used to it to...and that worries me. We talked about the possibility that I know too much to. Maybe if I did not know what he was going to spank me with?? I cannot believe I just wrote that *sigh* What is my little world coming to?
Thanks Susie....and I guess MM too (hurumph!) :D
Hi Lucy :) I think you're probably right. It's become too routine and you're getting too comfortable with the position and the spoon. I know you don't want to hear this, but since you asked so nicely, lol.......have you thought about trying the belt? Also, otk is great for stress relief and maintenance, but for more serious spankings, consider just leaning over the couch or bending over the bed. It really does change the whole flavor! Sorry!! Be careful what you ask for :0
ReplyDeleteYeah, great t-shirt!
Hi Cg :)
DeleteI thought you were my friend....kidding. I know I asked for this...really, what is wrong with me?
Confession time: I am scared to death of the belt. He has threatened me with it....so far that has all that it has been. Doesn't it hurt like crazy?? I mean, I guess that is the point....but just the sound of him taking it off does me in...eek!
I am sure Ryan will read all of this...and the jig will be up...updates at the bottom of the hour ;)
Sorry!!! Is it too late to delete my comment!
DeleteI used to feel the same about the belt. Now, I have a love/hate relationship with it. It really does depend entirely on the intent of the user. It can actually be a lot of fun. It can also sting pretty badly. I don't think it's as bad as you're probably thinbking it is! A wooden spoon can be pretty intense too!
I'll keep you posted....of course if he decides to use the thing....I may be standing while I type :D
DeleteYou are probably right....fear of the unknown. The spoon used to be intense....I must have buns of steel, I WISH ;)
Don't get mad...wonders if I should say anything...with us he doesn't necessarily spank hard...he starts slow and he builds, he varies the intensity, he changes implements, and he talks (never yelling or scolding so much - I'm his good girl, I take my spanking like a good girl, does this feel like a real spanking? If it's correction - your actions were bad, but never you, you know we can't allow this, it's unhealthy for us). This calm, focusing talk helps bring me where I need to be.
ReplyDeleteHi June :D
DeleteThere was only one time that Ryan was what I would call mad...and I wrote about that. When I have broken a rule, he is miffed, but he really hates to punish me...so he is upset/sad about it to begin with.
I agree when he talks about why we are there, it does help. We are still new to this....still trying to figure out what works and why. If he just starts spanking all rapid fire, I can't think....and I get mad....I think. If he spanks, talks, spanks, talks....it seems to go better...again I *think*! Can you tell I am still trying to figure this out in my little brain???
Of course, I am not mad :D I obviously need all the help I can get to figure this out. Ryan will be reading all of this at some point....we can learn from everyone.
Thank you :D
It sounds like you just need to change things up a little...or rather, he needs to change things up a little for you;) Add some new implements to your arsenal, ahem, I mean collection, so you don't always know what's coming. Try different positions, etc. You guys will figure it out:)
ReplyDeleteThis is just such a lovely topic, isn't it? ;)
DeleteSometimes I just cannot believe that I am the person typing this. 6 months ago, well all of this would have seemed unreal!
I think you are correct, Tess....he needs to change it up. Honestly, that scares the heck out of me....but I will do just about anything to get back to our new normal. :D
Thanks for stopping by!
Well, our bums get tougher, I can tell you that. Ian was just grumbling to me that I seem to be much harder to make an impression on. He said something to the effect of if this continues, what is it going to take, a blow torch? :D He is just mad that I don't cry and pee my pants when he announces a spanking anymore......I have toughened up.
ReplyDeleteWe don't have much of a implement selection, hand, belt and nasty spatula. A belt is a formidable weapon and I was and am scared of it. Especially if your HoH means it, it can hurt like nothing else I have felt.
Good luck, sweetie.
Ryan has been telling me for some time that my butt must be made of steel :) I wish! He was really going to town the other day with the spoon, and it was just not working. I guess change is in order. I used to be the same way about Ryan telling me that I am going to get IT.....I swear I would be a puddle before the first smack. We don't have many implements either...wooden spoons, the man does own a belt (eek!) and now he is talking about making a paddle <~~~~~ wth? He thought he was being all funny and asked me if I would like to go to Lowes and pick out a nice piece of wood for him to whip my hiney with....I politely declined ;)
DeleteHave a good day Lillie :)
Don't laugh -
DeleteIan was dropping me off to go shopping at the mall, and he said, "if you see something ......oh....made of wood...about this long (indicating something big enough to stir a cauldron) but nice and thick......like something you would cut stuff up on ...in the kitchen......pick that up for me, Sweepea."
I said, "sure Ian, no problem" and then I silently thought ....How stupid do you thinkI am....YOU MUST BE NUTS, if you think I am shopping for something to paddle my bottom with!" I thought "Go find your own weapons, Sir Spanksalot." Wow.....HoH's are ridiculous, and I mean that respectfully.
OMgosh, was he serious??? What in the world are they thinking? I looked at Ryan like he had three heads when he wanted me to join him at the nearest lumber yard. Ryan looks at everything now as if it could be a possible weapon to spank my behind with.....I agree they are nutso :D
DeleteAs you know, I can't very well comment on the implement issue. I can however, offer support to your state of mind when Ryan gets home after being alone all days with the boys. I didn't have twins, but at one point I did have 3 boys under the age of 5.
ReplyDeleteAs much as you love them, some times answering the questions, and cleaning up the floor for the umpteenth time that day can wear on one's nerves. There seems to be a fair amount of guilt that goes along with being frustrated with your children. I mean it is not their fault they are mental sponges- too bad this isn't the kind of sponge that is useful when it comes to grape juice ! It seems, sometimes that you don't have time to change your mind. Not too mention, you can't remember the last time you've had an uninterupted ADULT conversation---Then in walks hubby... Oh, you've got him in your cross-hairs! Direct hit! Then well, I suppose, in your case, the direct hits starting coming from the other party :)
It is wonderful that you have figured out something to relieve this stress and it helps deal with the up coming days. I have no doubt you'll figure this out too.
I really think you should consider making at least a night shirt out of your 'slogan' ! I wouldn't suggest putting on the back of your panties though. lol
Oh Wilma, you have made me smile. It sounds like you know exactly what goes on around here. My twins are almost 6 and my little guy is three. It can get quite interesting around here. I love them with all of my heart....but yikes....fix a meal, clean up a meal, break up a fight, help someone in the bathroom....etc. It just wears me out some days! And you are exactly right, poor Ryan walks in the door and some days I am ready to pounce. Those are the days, our little conversations otk are really more to help me than correct me. Kind of to remind me that we are on the same team...working together...and this too shall pass :) I am definitely not putting the slogan on the back of my panties....eek! A nightshirt would be cute, though :D
Delete*Consider this a public service announcement !* Barney and I were implement testing today, you know for sound, and well apparently,( although I didn't know this was on the agenda) for efficency/speed of getting the task done...Anyway, buy coat racks, start installing hooks, sticky hooks, over the door hooks, ones you screw in the wall, whatever. Just make sure you THROW OUT ALL YOUR HANGERS !!! We only tried the plastic one, but don't take any chances!!!
DeleteOMG...a hanger??? I bet that hurt like crazy! eek! We have done the whole sound test thing too. I sent Ryan in our closet and told him to count to 10....to give me a chance to get down the stairs...and then he started clapping loudly to see if I could hear anything. It was hilarious....and crazy, I sometimes look at us and cannot believe this is our life ;)
DeleteThank you for the PSA....funny thing he called me today and asked me if we needed any more kid size hanger because he saw them clearanced somewhere.....this may not be good :/
Lucy ! I hope you told him NO! That is what it was a little yellow kid's hanger ! I read from someone one that it is quiet. It maybe, but I know I certainly won't if it ever gets used !
ReplyDeleteI told him we have plenty. Unfortunately I literally bought one HUNDRED at a yard sale for a cheapo price. We have a rainbow of colors for him to choose from!!! eek!
DeleteThat is what I tell people about the spoon...it is quiet....I am not. Well, that was before I became immune to the spoon ;)
Hi Lucy, it sounds like maybe you are becoming used to either the spoon and/or the process. Perhaps you need to change things up a bit by trying different implements, positions etc.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure you will figure it out. Good luck :)
Hi Roz :D
DeleteI think you are right :(
Ryan read through all of this last night....so I am sure change will be coming.
I am a little nervous, but I know this is just part of the process.
~ Lucy
One thing that can help is to lotion your bottom. Both in general, to keep it softer, and right before the spanking. It adds to the sting. I am sure you are thrilled that I mention this. As others already said, yes changing things up will also help.
ReplyDeleteHi Ana~
DeleteLotion.....yikes :/
As crazy as this sounds, I just want things to go back to normal....I just want the whole process to work. I hate being spanked, but man I especially hate it when it doesn't work....if that makes any sense. I have accepted that this is part of our life now....I see the benefits...that for whatever reason I need this. I just want us to be better.
Ryan read through all of this last night...I am hopeful we will find a new sense of normalcy soon.
Thanks for visiting. I loved your last blog by the way.
I know you want it to go back to normal, but if your bottom is getting tougher and lotion makes it more sensitive...then it should even out. Theoretically. However, spanking is about 90% a head game.
DeleteI hope that it works out for you!
Thank you about the blog. :)
You are right about this being a head thing :D That was part of my issue...as well as a hiney of steel ;)
DeleteOur new version of normal is starting to be unveiled :)
I feel better....
Thanks :D